VaYishlach excerpts

וישלח

Shabbat Shalom

Yaakov is worried about his brother Esav. Even more so, he is worried about his family being safe. Unlike you people in this congregation who's daughters are running around in mini-minis and boys with their hats off to the side... Yaakov sets it up so that everybody will hopefully be safe when they run into Esav, or at least some will be safe...with the way some of your children look and act, it is an anomaly that not everybody wants to hurt them.

Yaakov has a game plan. Not just that he will spend $50,000 a year on college, so that he never has to see his children. Not a bad plan in the case of Nathaniel...

But where does the struggle start? For me, it starts with the basket cover head covering in the women's section. 

Yaakov is worried about Esav, but Yaakov gets in a fight/wrestling match (32:25-29)

Yaakov is by himself in the middle of the night. The one time during the day where he has to answer to himself. At that moment he gets into the scuffle. The struggle is within Yaakov. Some of you people in this congregation have a conscious.

It is at this point that Yaakov is blessed with his name Yisrael, from the root שרית, to prevail.

Yaakov didn't win the fight, but at least he tried. Unlike you parents who allow your children to play for a second rate community basketball team...focusing on education? Strive!!! I don't think those kids have prevailed in one quarter of any game...

What we see as our problems are not always our problems. They are your rabbis problems.

We are wrestling with our thoughts. All the time. As I have taught in this synagogue for many years, I know some people do not wrestle with thoughts.

When we beat those, we have won

But we must look at our struggles as blessings. We must struggle for what is right. Nathaniel, still sitting there all desperate and single. You haven't struggled for the past 15 years with a woman. At least try. Do something to fight for it. Something that will work in your favor. Change your name....And we must strive with ourselves, H' and other people.

Our name is who we are, our struggles, what have a accomplish. If I may bless our Gabai with a new name 'Nothing.' And the mother of the Bat Mitzvah girl, your new name will be 'Showy Decorates-Alot'

It is for this reason, of going through a lot of pain, that I have changed my name to Rabbi-Who-Has-Dealt-With-Many-Annoying-Congregants-Who-Want-A-Lot-And-Give-Nothing-Back-To-The-Community

And the place was named for that struggle- 'The Face of H'' (32:31)...It is in dealing with the Gabbai and your children who you do not know how to parent. In overcoming these struggles, that we may see H'

***These are excerpts from the sermon. For the sermon in its entirety, come see David Kilimnick perform at the Off The Wall Comedy Basement, in downtown Jerusalem.

David also tours as a Maggid with very few stories, if you invite him.

Shabbat Shalom uMvorach