Masai Excerpts

מסעי

Shabbat Shalom

(35:2) You give to the Levites, cities, from among you. 

The Levites are spread among the tribes. Among us...And the Levis are leaving. The best family this congregation ever seen. Mr. Strobel. Better than you. Mrs. Frankawitz. Better than you...The section with the short pants. Better than you...I have no idea why the children are wearing shorter pants.

Not one jacket among those under 18. Did the parents not educate this generation- we wear suits to shul. This is not Israel.

The Levites lived among the people. The people who were there to bring us all closer to H,' were present. The one's who task was not the land, but the service of H.' The people who focus on the non-physical, waste of time, like the Strobels, who work every day. Wake up at 5am to make their way to the gym and then minyan (services), and then off to the factory. Is that praiesworthy? Not when the Levis are leaving...They didn't work, because they are holy...They are retired Bernie.

What are you focused on? You are focused on which shirt you are going to wear...Because you don't have a suit jacket....

Even if you are focused on your money, you have to give of that. Make sure you make space for H' in your life. Space to be around people of H.' Support those who bear the yoke of Torah...Your rabbi hasn't received a raise in two years. And you wonder why the Levis are leaving the community. 

At least buy your children a suit.

(35:6) 6 of the Levite cities were cities of refuge. Not for criminal children. For those who were seeking refuge...You wear a jacket. The Levis are moving to a community where people respect Shabbat. A refuge from sinners, who watch their treadmill TV without headphones. It is annoying. Not everybody wants to watch CNN.

I can use refuge from Congregation Beis Emes Sefilah.

You know who would need a city of refuge. Max. The Frankawitzs with their supporting their family, but never giving...a gift, to our children would be nice...The Strobels...Maybe the Levis would affect you there. Maybe you should join the Levis in their move to Chicago, with some decent Jews.

(35:8) What amount do you give? According to the amount of your inheritance.

And the Levis, who had so little, as nobody gave them anything, gave so much to this shul. Unlike the Strobels. Unlike Frank and the Frankawitz, who's children are wearing short skinny pants and no jacket to shul...You had very rich parents and they had suits. What happened to them? 

You should have given some suits to the Levis...Yes. They wear them to shul....Because it is shul. All of the older people are wearing suits. Look around...

And you ask why we have the Nine Days and Tisha BAv. You ask why the Temples were destroyed. Short pants, no jacket, and all your money going to your gym membership....

And the little ones opening up the ark are wearing shorts.

***These are excerpts from the sermon. For the sermon in its entirety, come see David Kilimnick perform at the Off The Wall Comedy Basement, in downtown Jerusalem.

David also tours as a Maggid around the world, with very few stories.

Shabbat Shalom