VaYishlach excerpts

וישלח

Shabbat Shalom

(34:1) Dinah goes out to see the girls of the land and problems happen.

Same story we hear all the time in this congregation. The Finkelman’s daughter goes out, she doesn’t come back home. She is trying to be popular, and the next thing you know, she smoked….Then we have to talk about it at Kiddush.

Whenever a teen goes out and checks out the other women. Whenever teens try to make friends, problems happen. This is why we are starting the no friend rule in this congregation…We are not going to be friends, Bernie. No more talking about Kiddush, unless there is an issue. Too much happiness leads to problems. As we saw with Rivka last week- scheming.

Shechem violates Dinah, speaks to her emotions, and the news gets back to Yakov. I am sick of the messed-up conversations I have been hearing in this shule. No more crying. The amount of sobbing has been…It is as if the whole shule is on the same cycle. You all bother the rabbi at the same time….

(34:7) The sons were not happy, because this kind of thing does not happen. You don’t violate a sister of Israel, and you do not take the rabbi’s seat at breakfast. You also do not cry at Kiddush…Nobody cares if your daughter smokes Herman…

How often does anybody stick up for anything in this congregation. Is there any conviction over here? Is anything worth fighting for? We know there was the seat fiasco last week in the third row, left corner. That is the only thing anybody in this congregation fights for. The tradition of making the guests uncomfortable…Let the guy sit in your seat Fran. You let Golda sit in your seat…No. She is not a friend. All you do is complain about her. And then we hear about you going to the senior’s luncheons and the next thing you know, you are gambling…Friends are bad.

Upon request to marry Dinah, after violating her, the sons of Yakov decide to tell Shechem and Chamor, his father that this can only be done if they all circumcise themselves. This is not an easy thing to do. Frank doesn’t even donate blood…

(34:25) On the third day of the circumcision, when they were all weak, Shimon and Levi killed every male. They were confident.

What happened when the Tiny Titans beat our youth in field hockey? Did anybody do anything to the other team? Did you ransack their school? Did you pillage? No. Because you don’t care. If they were your friends, you would have done it with no cause…Because friends cause problems.

Did you care? Did you go out and kill them? No passion. The children are all still alive, and they are friends and still playing field hockey together. They are even friends with the other team. What will that lead to?...

Worried about what other people think about us. Anti-semitic thing that happened this week. I heard about it. Did you do anything? NO. Because you are not friends with them. You don’t have the confidence to stick up for our people…That is why your daughter smokes, Herman.

Yakov is now worried, as he knows the people of the land shall hate him and their family. Everybody hates our shule.

I am worried I am going to go broke, because I went out to eat with our friends while we were in Israel. Not falafel. Had to go for shwarma. We don’t have that money….We had to split the bill. It is class that causes problems. And somebody should have slain my friend before we went into debt.

He got the “best wine.” Very kind of him. Friends are bad. And he even wanted to smoke afterwards…

(35:1-4) Yakov is summoned to go to Bet El, to where H’ appeared to him when he fled from Esav. H’ appeared to him, unlike my close friend who appeared to dinner with not enough money.

Unlike the goalie of the WolfOhrs who didn’t show up for the game.

Unlike the anti-Semite who could have helped get rid of the congregants who are asking me questions all the time.

It all comes full circle, as Yakov now leads his family back to religion. H.’ What is important

‘They gave to Yakov their alien gods that were in their possession, and their rings that were in their ears…’

And all of you are thinking, what am I going to get for Chanukah? Am I going to get the North Face jacket for $300? Am I going to get the drone? Am I going to get the RV Barbie?

Am I going to get a Torah? That is the question I ask you. Is my friend going to pay for dinner? Do friends care?

It is about caring about family.

I tried leading this congregation back to the heart of it all. Where I first enjoyed my time away from this congregation, in Israel.

Did the congregation follow us to the Holy Land? No. If you weren’t friends, you would have all come…It is because you make decisions based on friends.

There is always one snide depressing friend who kills it for everybody…I took the congregation trip by myself. What beautiful communities there. Because there are no friends. Extremely not friendly.

They took all of our good members of our shule….yes, we should live there Bernie.

When H’ is with you, you don’t worry. When you go to Bet El, the House of Gd, when you are there, you don’t worry. When you give up your rings, gods and friends….

In Israel, we are not worried about what the others think. And we fight back. Because Israel has no friends. We don’t take a loss like the WolfOhrs field hockey team….Shameful like Shechem.