VaYikra Excerpts

ויקרא
Shabbat Shalom

Pesach Prep, and I still give you the Drasha. Sometimes you have to work, in order to get out of helping.

(4:3, 13, 23) Make a mistake, you bring a sacrifice. Be it the Cohen...
Point is, you make a mistake, you don't just say 'I'm sorry.' You do something about it.
Amends must be made. Bob ends up flubing the Haftorah and not even an 'I'm sorry.' He walks off the Bimah like he did something. Did he make a mistake?...Bernie. He made 30 mistakes. I counted. We didn't correct him because nobody cares about the Haftorah. It is not like he has the skills to layn the Torah...It was a mistake to ask him to read the Haftorah.
He walks off like a hero. no I'm sorry. 
 
Leaders who make mistakes the Cohen Gadol, the ruler and possibly the Sanhedrin (high court). 'Assembly' either means all the people or the high court (Radak).
I am not saying Bob is a leader. But he is part of the people. We have to take responsibility. Be it for ourselves or the leaders we chose. That is the assembly. And the Gabai assembeled the wrong guy to lead the Haftorah. A mistake...It is the Prophets, Neviim, that he reads. Anybody who could have told that Bob would mess it up...Didn't need to be a prophet to figure that out. You just have to hear how he says 'Shabbat Shalom' and you know...

You take out the fats that cover the innards (4:8-9, 19). There are certain things we don't need. Even when making up for a mistake, we cannot allow for just anything to be thrown on the alter. We take off the forbidden fats...Did anybody diet for Pesach? The neck fat on the whole left side of the shul is a mistake...But we do not bring our personal fat to the sacrifice. We leave out our mistakes when we amend for them. We do not ask Bob to sacrifice for us. We do not need him messing that up to...
As Pesach is coming, we get rid of the Chametz. We see what we are decent at and stay away from huge mistakes that we don't know. Last year, we were not sure if Chumus was good for Pesach. We still don't know what we hold as Ashkenazim...So the answer is 'no,' Bernie.

The one from the judges is brought by the congregations money. They are the representatives of the people. The Gabai is a mistake. 

(4:26) The Cohen shall provide for him atonement and it shall be forgiven for him.
That is why we don't ask Bob. Nothing would be forgiven. The gabai has offended the masses. Nobody forgives him....So who is going to represent us, for our atonement to be accepted?
Sometimes forgiveness is out of our hands. Such as when Mark went off on Frank in the middle of Shul, for the seat that was Franks...Mark counted the rows wrong.
Sometimes the sacrifice is involving the other person in the apology.

Reading the Haftorah is like a reading abilities quiz. Like getting up before the class and getting caught unprepared. Bob made a fool of himself...A mistake. Who needs to apologize? Is it the local days chool that failed Bob in third grade?...
A lot of mistakes. We need a Cohen in this community...At least somebody to read the Haftorahs. Or somebody to clean the shul. Get rid of the forbidden fats lying around...
Clean the community of its mistakes for Pesach.

***These are excerpts from the sermon. For the sermon in its entirety, come see David Kilimnick perform at the Off The Wall Comedy Basement, in downtown Jerusalem.
David also tours as a Maggid around the world, with very few stories.
Shabbat Shalom

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