Yitro Excerpts

יתרו

Shabbat Shalom

(19:8) Moshe tells the people what H’ says to do in preparation for Sinai, and the people say, together, ‘All that H’ says, we shall do.’ Sounds nothing like the board meeting last week. There was no togetherness. 

I told the board we needed a cleaner shul and I got flicked off...You flicked me off Karen. You waived me off with a click flick of the wrist. The only thing missing was the middle finger. This congregation is together in nothing. No agreement. The Jews said they would do what H' says...Even if they didn't do what H' said. They listened. They didn't flick off H' for telling them to prepare.

One person in this congregation listened to my sermons. They moved to Israel...Yes, they heard the message.

 

(19:10) The people are told to make themselves holy the next day ‘and wash their clothes…tomorrow H’ will descend in the sight of all the nation at Har Sinai.’

The way you people dress for shul. Not holy. You cannot show up disheveled and expect Gd to...That is why H' has not spoken to us. H' did not say to keep dirty.

 

Cleanliness is not happening here. People have to pray with their fingers on their nose, due to the stench coming out of the Kiddush club corner over there...choolant eating during the Haftorah will stop....

 

What is Har Sinai? A place that needs clean people. 

Ever seen Sinai? A lot of clean people who do not flick off their rabbis.

 

(19:14) They made themselves holy and washed their clothes.

Cleanliness. Again.

 

They listened. They had clean clothes and didn’t touch the mountain. So they wouldn’t be killed (19:12). I have told the sisterhood to institute penalties for those who touch the kiddush food before kiddush...And you wonder why the Stella D'oros are always full of dirt. Because nobody washes their hands before Kiddush. And then the kids touch them. 

 

(19:16) And the sound of the shofar was strong, and there was thunder and lighting and the people were scared. We need more scared people in this congregation. Scared people don't show up to shul without a tie. Scared people do not show up to shul and eat choolant before the community kiddush. Scared people do not flick off the rabbi. Scared people do not walk outside when there is thunder and lighting, without a raincoat...It is raining outside and you have on no suit jacket or raincoat...At least a raincoat is a sort of jacket Bernie. It is respectful to the situation. It shows people that you are listening.

 

They were then scared. The shofar is a scary sound, especially when Frank blows it. I was scared by Karen, when she cursed me out for noting that it might be a good idea to have a clean shul

We need fear to listen. From now on, I shall talk in a deeper voice, so you will take me seriously.

If you feared, you would shower. You would be cleaner. Michael would not be the boy that has no friends in school if you instilled some fear in him. Sinai was about people coming together and we cannot do that when half of the congregation smells like dew.